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Moving Forward at the Crossroad

Thanks Keith Avery for the photo!
Thanks Keith Avery for the photo!

A friend recently posted about being at a crossroad in her life as she explores a new opportunity. I immediately responded with – I know exactly how you feel!!!

I’ve been sitting at a crossroad for quite a while now.  In fact, I’m not even sure how long its been.  I think I’ve seen it coming for at least a year.  Slowly creeping up to the stop sign on a deserted country road.

And I’ve just kind of sat here for the last month or so.  Debating which way to go.  Deciding. Getting ready to press down on the accelerator, just to quickly pull my foot back to the brake again.

I’m getting nowhere.

Naomi reminds me of this often.  She’s trying to learn how to move, and will often lay on the floor and move her hips back and forth quickly, trying to get somewhere.

She never gets anywhere of course, but uses up a lot of energy in the process.

That’s me. I’m exhausted with all the energy I’m putting forth trying to make a decision of what to do and actually commit to doing it.

When Naomi finally decides where she want to go, she can get herself there. Even at 5 months old she needs to focus and decide what she wants in order to move toward it.

Decision is key.

You can’t do it all. I can’t do it all. As much as I want to, I can’t. So I have to decide which path I’m going to take and take it. Easier said than done, right!?!

We’ve all been there – and probably will all be here again some day.

I was praying about this as I unloaded the dishwasher this morning.  Lord, is there anyone in the Bible who had to sit at a crossroads?


(I felt a bit sucker-punched in the gut at this point. )

He was a shepherd when he was anointed to be king. He couldn’t continue to be a shepherd and be king. He had to choose to leave one behind, for the greater glory of the other.

I imagine this wasn’t an easy decision for young David.  We see from the Psalms that David had a great love for his sheep and being a shepherd. He seemed like he was doing well as one, too. Going into the service of King Saul had to be a pretty radical life change for him to contemplate.

Sheep and open air/space to the confines of a royal court with a king who was losing his mind?  Not a decision, I’d want to make.

But this really wasn’t the decision at hand for David to make, either.  His decision was to follow God’s leading into the glory that He had planned for David, or to stay safe and comfortable with what he already knew he could do, and do well.

And here I sit, facing the same decision myself.

I want to follow God’s anointing on my life. To follow Him into whatever He has planned. But I’m scared of what “raging King Sauls” I might run into.

And I don’t want to leave my sheep – or in my case my bees, and the business we’ve already built.

But the Lord is leading me to leave this part of my life behind.  I know it – and I’m excited and terrified all at the same time.

I know I will always have a great affinity for my little buzzies. And I know that they will probably be used in more metaphors than I can even imagine now. But I must leave the day to day operations behind.

This means closing Hatcher’s Honey Bee Farm, so that I can pursue God’s anointing on my  my family’s life.

I didn’t start writing this post as a goodbye – in fact I think I’m kind of shocked to typing these words.  But a goodbye it must be.  In order to move forward we have to make a decision. And focus. I can’t do both.

I’m putting my foot and the accelerator, and pulling out. To where yet, I don’t know. God’s telling me to write, to blog, and to share – something new.

Lord, please lead me and Chris!


Moving Forward in Obedience

Struggling to find my focus.  Dealing with my insecurities.  My fears, my frustrations, my hopes, and my desires.

I’ve got so many things I want to write and share, but ….

I get distracted. I get afraid. I’ve got to fold the laundry, make dinner, feed Naomi, let the dog out, etc etc.

And the day is gone. I’m left frustrated and agitated again.  I sit down to write and my mind gets lost in a myriad of Facebook posts, and links to make money (major distraction right now). Then its late. I’m tired, and agitated even more – and I feel like a failure.

I get up the next morning and determine to do better, just to be hit by the wave of negative emotions and thoughts of how is this day going to be any different than the rest.

How is this post going to be any different that the other one that I’ve been writing for the last week that is sitting in the draft box?

I’m going to post it – flaws and mistakes and all. (So if you’re reading this and see a lot of typos – please excuse them. I have to get past my perfectionism that is holding me back!).

God has a plan for me to write. To write boldly and confidently and to share what He’s been teaching me.  I’m to encourage and teach as I’ve been taught.

I’m not going to listen to the lies that Satan keeps telling me that I’m not good enough. That nobody wants to hear what I have to say.  That I’m just going to fail again.  That I’m not doing this blogging thing good enough.

I’m going to stop listening to my perfectionist side that says, you better make this bold, and go back and fix that.  You’ve got to use the right format, and figure out how to do xy and z first.

I’m just going to be obedient to what God is telling me. To write.

He encouraged me today with two posts from other women.  The first from a guest post from Lysa TerKeurst entitled When Strong Mamas Feel Week.

“Mama, you are strong. Persevering. Tough. Able to bend without breaking. Willing to be humbled to the point of humiliation. Not blinded. A hunter for wisdom. A praying through woman. A courageous mama. One that wants your child to not just follow the rules but, more.” Lysa TerKeurst

That’s me. That’s what I’m called to be – A hunter for wisdom.  Willing to share my humiliation and heartbreak, and seek the wisdom in it to share with others.

It’s a daunting task.  A task I don’t think I can do.

And yet I must.  There is the compelling voice inside me telling me I must. Telling me I can.

So I’m swallowing every part of me that wants to scream and run in fear. With tears streaming down my face, I’m writing.  I’m sharing. Obeying God the best way I know how.

At the side bar of her post I see a link for (in)Courage.  I saw it yesterday and was curious about it. So I clicked it today. And what I read was just another powerful way that the Lord said to me – Go. Write.

The post shared exactly what my screaming heart has been saying.  Everything from the lying voice inside my head, to my unconfessed fears of insignificance. And gave me the courage to move forward.

“I know that voice (the lying one) is a one-way-ticket to walking away from all the glory and the beauty that has been planned into my DNA. And yes some of it will be messy. And some of it won’t turn out the way I imagined. And much of it will be a work in progress.

But the some things I might not be perfect at, aren’t the sum total of no good.

I might not be good enough, brave enough, profound enough. But the God who made me – He. is. enough.” 

Lisa-Jo – What You Think You’re Not Good At is Only Half the Story

I don’t want to miss what God has planned for me. So I’m going to keep writing. If for no one else, then as an act of obedience to the Lord.

I’m going to listen to voice of the Holy Spirit, and allow Him to transform me by the renewing of my mind (Romans 12). This is going to mean I have to take every thought captive (I know there’s a reference here but I don’t know the address).  Starting now, and every thought from now.

I know its not going to be perfect.  I know its going to get messy at times.

I know I’m going to have to walk in faith for our finances. I’m going to have to let go of some dreams and some pursuits in life.  I’m going to have to say ‘no’ to some of the good activities and opportunities to help and serve that come my way.  I’m going to have to open myself up to criticism and hurt, even by those I hold dear.

I don’t have it to do it. But the power of the Living God is in me – the same power that rose Christ from the dead (again I’ll have to find the reference to the Scripture here 🙂 ).


Meal Planning Monday

It’s been a Monday, a Meal Planning Monday.

Monday Meal Plan

BLAH! I hate Meal Planning Monday! Can you relate?

Always trying to find Cheap, Easy to fix, Yummy, Healthy, AND pretty much Paleo meals is exhausting — but doable.

‘I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. I can do …’

This needs to be my mantra on Meal Planning Mondays.  (Well, everyday, but especially on Meal Planning Mondays!)

I did it.  I may not be ecstatic about my plan, but I did it.  Here it is:

Breakfasts: Eggs, Paleo Pancakes, French Fries/Sweet Potato Fries

Lunches: Chris: Ham & Fruit, or Leftovers      Me: Chicken on Salad, Fruit, or Leftovers


    • Oregano Chicken, french fries (not really Paleo)
    • Crockpot Turkey Thighs & Veggies
    • Veggie Marzetti
    • Chicken Legs, Broccoli, & Squash
    • Veggie Pizza
    • Ginger Mahi Mahi, and a vegetable
    • Out


  • Easy Grain Free Muffins (these are really yummy, tried tonight, but took more than 5 minutes to make for this Mommy, but not too much!)
  • Ice Cream – haven’t decided on flavor yet  🙂

So that’s my plan for the week.  I’m exhausted. I’m looking for some wisdom and some help to make this process easier.  If you’ve got any tips, tricks, or suggestions, please leave a comment and let me know!!!

There’s got to be a great app for this?! Right.

My Life Plan: How I Want to Be Remembered

Researching to write a blog led me to many great blogs.  There are so many great ones out there!

One that I stumbled upon was that of Michael Hyatt and his free Life Plan e-book.  After reading just a page or 2, I decided to write out a Life Plan, and blog my way through the process.

He suggests starting with the end.  Envisioning what you want to be remembered for how you want to be remembered. I wrote the first part and realized this is the wrong question!

I have no idea what I want to be remembered for doing – I hope to do a lot of things. And I definitely DON’T want to be remembered for doing some things. I want to be remember for HOW I did things.

David, as in David and Goliath, isn’t remembered countless generations later for just killing Goliath, but for How he killed him – a rock and a sling, and faith in a Mighty and All-Powerful God!

I think in general, that about sums it up for me.  I want to be remembered as somebody who followed God obediently into ‘something new’, with faith in a Mighty and All-Powerful God. And I want others to follow too.

I want to learn, grow, and do the things that God designed me to do. I’m still not exactly sure what that is in the practical day-to-day sense.  But I know that God is leading me into ‘something new’.  I know I’m supposed to be sharing the things He is teaching me as I’m seeking wisdom.

It’s a scary thing.  There’s so much to learn in blogging – and I’m a perfectionist who doesn’t want to make any mistakes.  But I will, so please bare with me.

I’ve got no idea where this journey is going to lead me, or you my readers. But I’ll hope you’ll follow along with me here.  Leave a comment and tell me – how do you want to be remembered.

Life Plan???

I’ve got no idea where I’m going in life.question mark

Correction. I have 1,001 ideas of where to go in life, but am so overwhelmed by all the wonderful prospects that I can’t decide where to go.

It’s like planning a vacation.  There are SO many great options, but where should I go?

A friend of mine mentioned the idea of Life Planning to me not to long ago, and suggested Chris and I look into it.  I thought it was a great idea, and have spent a small amount of effort looking at it.

Well in preparing to write a blog over the last week and half, I’ve done pretty much nothing but think about my life.  What could/should I write about.  I can write about a myriad of topics. I’ve  got almost a full page of blog post ideas already written down, and tons more that I’ve come up with while not near my computer.

In fact, I’ve had so many its a bit overwhelming!  I keep wanting to kick myself for not starting a blog sooner – and researching all this stuff sooner!  If only I’d know a year ago – I could be so much further ahead. I had so much more time before my wonderful blessing daughter came along, that I wasted.


Can’t waste more time though sitting and grumbling at myself for wasting time.  I can start fresh today. God’s mercy is new each morning (Lamentations 3:22-23).

I have to keep reminding myself that! Seeking God’s forgiveness is sometimes easier than forgiving myself.  He keeps reminding me though that He chose me before the foundations of the earth to be ‘holy and blameless’ before Him (Ephesians 1:4).

That’s a pretty big deal!  He knew all I was going to do, but still chose me to be holy and blameless!  That’s a big SIGH of RELIEF! (Literally, I just sighed really big and deep!)

Do you realize this means I don’t have to perfect?!? And neither do you!

What a revelation! So with that behind me I’m going to move imperfectly forward…

Starting with writing out a Life Plan – here on my blog. I’m going to seek wisdom for my life.

I hope you’ll join me!